Saying goodbye to an old friend is never easy. When you’re a writer by trade, there’s no
denying that your computer is your friend.
It’s your constant companion and your lifeline. It’s your most important tool. In the case of a laptop, particularly, it
rests for hours on the tops of your legs, almost becoming one with them. Your fingers become accustomed to the feel of
the keys, your wrists to the distance to the keyboard. You learn its quirks, and I daresay it learns
yours, in this creepy age of autofill and autocorrect.
On my old friend, the letters are worn off of some keys that
have become smooth and shiny from faithful service. The matte
finish on the space bar has taken on that same smooth shine on the right side,
where my fingerprints wear on it like a stream tumbles over river rocks.
I’ve had my Gateway NV laptop for 4 ½ years. That’s a long time in electronic device
years, especially one with such frequent use.
I’ve known for quite some time that it was “time,” and that I should
start looking for a replacement. So I
looked, and looked, and looked. I looked
for months. I was going to order it from
Lenovo, but I just couldn’t pull the trigger.
I was going to get one on sale at Staples that seemed quite good, but I
just couldn’t take the plunge.
Shaking my head at myself, I knew what would happen. I knew I would wait until the Gateway crashed
and I was left effectively computerless, shut off from the world, save by
smartphone. One cannot attend to
copywriting clients’ needs by smartphone.
Novels can be written on a
smartphone, I suppose, but I wouldn’t want to try it.
So I did the very thing I did not want to do, as Paul says
in the New Testament. After a day of
struggling with half-loaded internet pages and strange behavior, I knew my
friend was ailing. Then it was
confirmed: malware. At 8pm, I found
myself walking through the sliding doors at Best Buy, with a blast of air
conditioning blowing my hair back. “I’m
here to buy. Tonight. Right now,” I told George, the world’s fastest
computer advisor and seller. I was
thankful that they were still open, and that I had such an efficient
salesperson.
He helped me select exactly what I said (I thought) I
wanted. I walked out of the store at
8:45pm with a brand new computer. That’s
record time, folks.
This post is the very first thing I have written on it (save
Facebook posts, etc.), and I had a devil of a time finding Microsoft Word. Not sure I can find it again. Going from Windows 7 to Windows 8.1 is
figuratively like a fish learning to live on dry land. Such drastic changes should be outlawed. Seriously.
I’ll get used to this one, though, and maybe I should even name it so I won't want to kill it while I get used to it. We name our cars,
so why not our computers? This may help
as I mumble innovative new curse words inspired by Windows 8.1.
So I wave goodbye to my old friend, and lay him to rest
under a tombstone without a name. “Here
lies the Gateway NV I loved for 4 ½ years, who gave me very few problems. Upon him, I wrote my first complete novel and
countless short stories. Now he can run
and play in laptop Heaven with the Gateway that got me through law school, the
Toshiba that ate too many meaningful files to mention, and the boxy, heavy, old
Compaq that operated in "safe mode" for at least its last year of existence. Well done, Gateway NV.” Rest in peace, friend. You deserve it.
Suggest a name for my new laptop in the comments. Percival?
Fabio? Lenny the Lenovo?
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